Entrepreneur Mom Now Calgary interviewed our Founder Natacha Beim when we visited the Calgary Franchise Expo.

Watch the interview here:

As a parent, there is nothing more disconcerting than having to take something from your child. I’ve had parents call me late in the evening to ask me to open the school doors so they can recover their child’s blanket. A very guilty parent goes on to tell me how their child is crying inconsolably and won’t go to sleep without it. When a mother is affected by breast cancer, telling her child would take away much more than an object of affection; it would take away her child’s innocence.

This year, an average of 445 Canadian women will be diagnosed with breast cancer each week. Many of these women will be faced with the difficult decision of whether or not to turn their child’s world upside down.

I have not been diagnosed with breast cancer, but I have coached several mothers and families through the process. I have, however, had to have difficult conversations with my sons when going for two operations, in addition to preparing everyone for the varied outcomes, whether good or bad. As a teacher, researcher, early development expert, parenting coach and, of course, as a mother, I humbly offer you these words of advice:

To Tell or Not to Tell

This is a very personal and circumstantial decision. One of the major factors is age. I recommend telling your child only if he or she is older than two or three. Although it may seem young still, by then a child can already sense a difference in the household and is at threat of internalizing the problem. Children learn to trust you and it’s important for you to be honest with them. Breaking the news will also help the child prepare for the physical changes that may occur and give them time to process the situation.

When Not to Tell

If a child is too young to comprehend what cancer is and how it might affect their mother, the conversation is better reserved for when they’re a bit older. If your child is older, but you truly feel that they can’t emotionally handle the news, I recommend seeing a therapist, but still facing the situation. Likewise, if you’re having a hard time processing the news yourself, it’s not a good time to have a conversation with your child. Wait until you feel stronger, or consult a therapist yourself first. It is very important that you do not alarm your child.

When To Tell

Never tell until your doctor has confirmed your fears, and you have concrete, tangible information to share with your children. Depending on the family dynamics, it can be a good idea to gather everyone together to break the news. It’s important to choose a weekend or another time of leisure so everyone has time to process the information and answer questions as they arise. Pick a time when you’re feeling particularly strong, not emotional. As a mother, they will look to you for support, even during this time.

What to Expect Once You’ve Told

Your child will have a lot of questions and it’s important that you answer them all; if you don’t know the answer you can research together. You may also be surprised to find that many of these questions will pertain to them: “Who will take care of me if something happens to you?” Some questions may seem selfish and hurtful, but they are very important to your child, and they too need an answer.

Your child may feel angry with you but you must not take it personally. Understand these are normal feelings, even when they hurt. Have faith that these feelings will pass in due time.

More than ever your child will need reassurance that they are loved. Do things as a family as much as possible, but expect that your child may withdraw from you. That’s okay, it’s just a way for them to protect themselves. Respect their needs.

How Can I Make it Better?

Your attitude will have a huge impact on your child. Try not to show them your fears, but reassure them that things will get better. If you feel pain, it’s okay to share that with your children, and allow them to help by bringing you medicine, or a pillow and blanket so you can have a nap, for example. Likewise, when you are ready to go to the hospital, let them help as much as possible by picking a nightgown for you to wear during your stay, or drawing a picture to decorate your room. Your partner or a family member can help your children buy a new book for you to bring, or something you will really love. It is really important for your children to take a proactive role during this time, and to help in your recovery. It will be just as beneficial for them as it is for you.

Not Forgetting Yourself

As difficult and unfair as it might seem, you need to take some time for yourself when you feel you need it. Do something you love and do the things that make you happy; you will be better prepared to spend quality time with your children if you take care of your needs and wants. Not only will this help your children, it will tremendously aid in your recovery.

[ Source: The Huffington Post Canada ]

Having your child prepare a healthy meal for the family seems like an unattainable dream for most parents.

However, if you instil the habit of cooking in your child at an early age, you are providing them with the skills they need to live a healthy life, and having fun while doing it.

When most children are young, there is nothing they want more than to help in the kitchen. While that help is not always needed, with patience and a little direction you can nurture that passion to cook in to a desirable talent. Here are some tips to get you started.

Starting with babies and toddlers

Involve your little one by asking them to measure and mix ingredients, wash fruit and vegetables (never raw meat or eggs), or cut items with a plastic, disposable “party” knife. Discuss the different aromas, colours and textures of the ingredients, inviting your child to taste them along the way. You can also talk about the different items in terms of their health benefits, so that they understand what differentiates healthy food from unhealthy food. Involving your child in the preparation of meals will also help with picky eaters, as children are more likely to eat something that they have helped prepare.

Starting with young children

If your child is naturally interested in cooking, involve them in as many aspects of the meal preparation as you can. You can be more specific about what you need at this age, and give directions that require more reasoning. For example, ask your child to chop three carrots, or one cup of mushrooms, and teach them what foods can be eaten raw and which ones need to be cooked. You an also visit a community garden or plant vegetables at home to educate your child on where food comes from, and how it grows. All of these actions cultivate a healthy lifestyle for your child at an early age.

If your child is not naturally eager to cook or loses interest, don’t give up! Invite them to prepare cookies or decorate a cake together. Try to find recipes that appeal to your child, but remember to always look for healthier options, such as sugar free and gluten free. Ideally you should encourage them to make a fruit salad, some fresh fruit juice, a delicious smoothie, or real fruit “popsicles”. When children view cooking as a fun science experiment, or an opportunity to express their creativity, they are excited to join in.

Starting with older children and teens

One of the most effective ways to entice a reluctant child to cook is to trade cooking for a before or after dinner chore. Simply put, tell your child that if they would like to help you cook, you would be delighted to help set the table. Ask your child how they wish to help, and gradually they will enjoy cooking, gain skills in the kitchen, and require less assistance. Invite your child to look for recipes they would like to try, give them healthy recipe books to look through, or invent recipes together. As they gain more confidence, teach them to read labels and plan balanced meals.

Another skill to foster at this age is the art of entertaining; it can be as simple as preparing something special to eat when friends come over, or as intricate as preparing food for a party. Count on your child at least once a week to prepare a meal for the family. Remember, it’s important to show your child that you trust them in the kitchen and you view them as capable, no matter how simple the meal is.

What to do if you can’t cook

If your culinary skills are less than adequate, why not learn with your child? Buy a simple and nutritious cookbook designed for children, and plan to cook one or two meals together each week. Start with simple dishes and gradually move on to more complex recipes; your child will love your openness to learn, and will be eager to learn with you.

Cooking with your child is a fantastic bonding activity, provided you are open to suggestions and not too focused on teaching a recipe “your way”. It is also an opportunity to express a person’s uniqueness, and a great way to introduce a healthy lifestyle to your child at a young age. More importantly, cooking healthy meals together will ensure your child has the necessary skills to not rely on fast food or other unhealthy choices when they go out on their own.

Bon Appétit!

| Source: Huffington Post |

A study published by Dobbs-Oates & Baroody concludes that preschool girls show more interest in literacy activities than do boys of the same age range.

So what? You might think – boys have other interests. Well, yes, but an interest in literacy means much more than just that:

• The more a child is interested in books and in reading, the less he is likely to suffer from attention deficit, hyperactivity, withdrawal and aggression.
• Research has shown that Preschoolers’ early literacy skills are related to children’s later reading skills and achievement in elementary school.
• Research also shows that reading skills in first grade are related to reading achievement in secondary school.

If pre-school boys are not interested in reading, they will not have the skills necessary for reading success, and they will must likely be poor readers in high-school.

Why don’t boys like to read?

This of course is an over-generalization. Many boys very much enjoy reading, and many girls don’t. Gender preferences work more like a scale than they do a straight separation. Most children, boys and girls, are not on the white end or the black end, they are a different shade of grey.

Having said that, there are a few possible explanations for boys being less interested in reading than girls:

• The purpose of the book has a lot to do with it: girls read for enjoyment whereas boys tend to read more non-fiction, practical books (to learn about something in particular).
• In pre-school, however, teachers are mainly female, and tend to choose books that tell children a story (narrative) and that are more nurturing in nature. These may be less appealing to boys than to girls, and boys may lose interested in reading.
• The themes of preschool books also may be more nurturing and therefore more geared towards girls than boys, who prefer action-driven (super-heroes), scary (pirates, vilains) or practical books (trucks, dinosaurs).
• Books available at school or at home for young children may not be the genre that appeals to boys, and therefore, they are less likely to want to read.
• Parents who believe reading is enjoyable and view their children as capable are more likely to read to them and to provide literacy experiences, which would influence the pre-schooler’s interest in reading.

Helping your son develop a love for reading

The difference in interest between boys and girls may only be due to our choices and expectations as parents and educators. Here are some tips to gain more interest.

Go to the library together and help your child choose books that interest him. If you would like to expose him to better literary choices, you can invite him to choose one book to read, and ask if you could chose a second one. Your son will be delighted to have two stories read to him, and you will be able to choose a good book while at the same time reading the one he chooses.

Read as a family. Read to your child every day and encourage your child to read with you, side by side, each with your own book. Children who see their parents reading for pleasure learn that reading is a pleasurable activity, and become great readers.

Donate a few good books to your child’s junior kindergarten or pre-school that cater to the interest of your son, sharing what you have learned with the teachers. As this is very recent research, many teachers may not be aware of what books are best for young boys.

Literacy skills are also acquired by writing. Encourage your son to invent his own adventure books and write and illustrate them. This will develop his creativity and instill an interest in the written language.

The most important factor in being a lifelong reader is to actually love reading. Continue reading together once your son is able to read by himself.

Getting your young child to be interested in books now will have lifelong repercussions and is well worth the dedication. Happy reading!

|Source: Huffintgon Post|

An excited three-year-old grabs a bottle of milk from the table and joyfully shakes it until its contents spill all over the kitchen floor. The child’s mother rushes towards the pool of white liquid spreading across the tiles, looks up at her child and grins.

“What happens now?” she asks enthusiastically. They explore the consequences together. No scolding or words of disapproval are muttered. Sound unlikely? In most North American households this scenario would play out very differently. That’s because too often parents are quick to scorn their children for making mistakes. In reality, however, there are great advantages to teaching your children to learn from their mistakes.

A study from Michigan State University shows people who think they can learn from their mistakes have a different brain reaction to errors than those who don’t. The study demonstrates that people who think they can learn from their mistakes bounce back faster after making one. Furthermore, their brains are more alert to the fact they’ve made a mistake, and subsequently are quicker to correct it. This way of thinking is a pattern that can be developed in childhood.

Children who expect to make mistakes are much more willing to try new things and take on difficult tasks. As a result they’re open to learning more both at school and in other environments.

Parents who feel aversion to making mistakes themselves often pass this burden on to their children. However, once aware, there is a great opportunity to break the cycle. Parents can assure their child’s mistakes are normal, in fact even grown-ups make them. What matters is what we do to correct them.

How to turn mistakes into learning opportunities:

The first step is to acknowledge when your child has made a mistake and explore the outcome. Ask what he learned from the experience, and how he thinks he can improve the next time around. Reiterate as often as you can that making mistakes means learning something new.

Consistency is key. When you are the one making a mistake, make sure you react the same way. For example, if you break a glass you can say, “I made the mistake of leaving it too close to the edge of the table. Next time, I’ll be careful to leave it in the center so it won’t fall when I move my arms.”

If it’s your child who breaks a glass, respond calmly. Telling your child something along the lines of “I told you so,” does not help. Instead, ask questions like, “how did your glass fall?” or “what can you do next time so you don’t make that same mistake?” This allows your child to determine where they went wrong and think of a solution for next time.

The second step is to instill the habit of taking responsibility for one’s mistakes. Many parents rush to fix their children’s mistakes. In doing so they rob their children of the opportunity to shoulder responsibility.

Going back to the broken glass scenario. Once your child has determined why the glass broke and how they can prevent it from falling next time, ask how they plan to fix the problem, and let them clean the mess without assistance. Figuring out how to solve the problem provides an opportunity for your child to learn responsibility and gain confidence in knowing mistakes can be made right, or at least better. Children can gain much pride from knowing they can be trusted to find an adequate solution to a problem they themselves create.

When children learn from their mistakes and are encouraged to find creative solutions, they develop problem-solving skills that last long into the future.

|Source: The Huffington Post|

Children are natural born scientists. To nurture this type of learning in children, allow them to explore their environment safely and freely and with plenty of time to investigate new discoveries. Children have an innate sense of wonder and curiosity about the world. They naturally build theories, test them, evaluate what worked and what didn’t, then figure out why. Asking questions is the first step to understanding. Why does water and dirt combine to make mud? Why do some things float in the tub while others sink to the bottom? How do shadows work? Why do caterpillars make cocoons?

When are children ready to learn science?

Almost all young children “do science” naturally. Most of the time they actively search for new knowledge and experiences in the world around

them. They develop theories about what they see and how it works. They are eager to figure out why turning the light on makes everything so bright, or want plug things into electrical sockets. In an effort to keep them safe (and to keep the house a little cleaner), we as parents often stop them from discovering the world around them. Slowly, over the years, many children sadly lose that inquisitive spark they were born with. As a result, creative thinking is compromised. But it is those same creative thinking skills that will help them succeed in the future by enabling them to contribute new ideas or challenge the status quo.

How can I teach science at home?

For children, science just happens. You have to ensure, as a parent, that your child’s questions are valued and appreciated. Take the time to listen, and don’t be too quick to give the answer away. Instead, ask questions like “I wonder how we could find out the answer to your question?” By doing this, you are modeling for your child how to learn, and where to look for knowledge. Some days you will look in a book, other times you will look on the computer, ask a friend, or visit a museum, a science center, or a library. It all depends on the question.

Working together with your child to discover the answer will get them excited about the process. As your child gets in the habit of looking for the answers with you, he will eventually do it on his own. Once that is established, he will be a lifelong learner. To get started, here are a few activities you could try:

Cooking

Cooking is a live experiment in action. Involve your child in the kitchen when you prepare meals. It may take you a little longer, but you are providing the ideal science lab, teaching your child about food and nutrition, helping them feel appreciated at home and teaching a valuable skill. Start with something easy, like smoothies (with yogurt and fruit), or salad. Increase the complexity as they grow. Teach them to follow a recipe (measure, mix, etc.) and also let them experiment with different ingredients, without the guidance of a recipe. In the kitchen, your child will learn science principles like mixing, measuring, and changing matter.

Pets

Children love to observe animals to see the differences in how they communicate and behave. If you’re not ready for a pet, consider an aquarium, and if that is too much of a commitment, visit your garden or a pet store. Snails, butterflies, grasshoppers, worms, stick bugs, crickets, or any kind of insect make for great temporary pets, provided you supply leaves sprayed with a little water, dirt, sand, or pebbles. Figuring out what these insects need to eat and rest is a discovery in itself.

Water – Provide buckets, spoons and other digging utensils so they can mix in sand and dirt, and don’t forget pouring utensils. No need to buy anything fancy. You will find everything you need in your kitchen cupboards. In a pond or in the tub, you can explore with empty bottles, add bubbles, add gears, turkey basters, or anything else they can explore the water with.

A Garden

Invite your child to plant seeds and have an indoor or outdoor garden. You can plant flowers or, better yet, fruits and vegetables. Explore all kinds of seeds and roots: let a potato grow roots, or garlic, or an onion, encourage your child to draw his observations. Put beans in a CD case with wet cotton balls, to see the tiny plant begin to grow before you plant it. Explore what happens to fruits or vegetables as they decay. See what happens when a plant or flower receives water, good soil and sunshine, as opposed to growing in the shade.

Light and Shadows

Provide flashlights, translucent materials and a grey wall. You can collect different types of materials to see which ones let the light pass through (translucent) and which don’t (opaque). You can also play with window prisms, and see how the different colours of light are reflected on the floor when the sun hits them.

Tadpoles and butterflies

This is a favorite of early learning schools, but it can also be done at home. Observing a caterpillar building a cocoon, or a tadpole metamorphosing into a frog, is an incredible experience for a child. Provide a camera for your child to take lots of photos he or she can observe later.

As your child becomes an avid scientist, he or she will satisfy their curiosity and discover learning is a fun adventure. This will give you plenty of new topics to talk about. Once you see your child blossom through science and develop their ability to think, you will be glad you put up with a few messes here and there.

|Source: Westcoast Families|

Reading is the most important habit to instil in children. It increases their vocabulary, which directly increases their performance at school.

Reading will expand their knowledge in every other area, and open their minds to so many possibilities. Because children are often learning the actual phonetic combinations at school, and exploring reading more on a practical side, the love of reading is best fostered at home, and supported by you, the parent.

When children are little, take the time to read to them every night, and delight in the stories you discover together. To make that time even more special, here are ten tips you can use:

1. Take the time to look at the images together

Instead of just reading the book, look at the images with your child and see what they tell you. This will teach your child to look for clues in the images that tell them what is about to happen in the book. Using this strategy will help the child increase their vocabulary by enabling them to “guess” what a new word means, just by understanding its context.

2.Use different voices for different characters in a book

By making a special voice for the ogre of the story, then for the little girl they meet, and all the other characters, you help your child imagine the story, bringing it to life. Once your child begins to read, even when they are not reading out loud, they will in turn adopt the habit of giving book characters their own voice, their own life, which will greatly increase their reading comprehension skills and work with their imagination.

3. Follow with your finger

If your child is just learning to read or is an inexperienced reader, it helps when you follow with your finger as you tell the story. This will show them that, in the English language, we read from left to right. It will also help your child discover that every word you are reading is there, on the book, and they will start visually recognizing whole words. This is like watching a movie with subtitles. You don’t need to read the subtitles if you understand the language, but you tend to want to read them anyway.

4. After reading to your child, read with your child

When your child is beginning to read alone, still be sure to make this a great bonding experience, by spending time with them while they read. Many parents put a lot of effort in teaching their children to read, and reading to them every night until they learn to do it alone, but then stop once the child can read. Remember, even though the child can now read, they will miss that time with you and will not feel the same encouragement. Your job is now to show them how great it is to read. Read them stories still, from time to time, and other times just sit by them and read your own book while they reads theirs. This will not only show that you like reading, it will give the two of you time to bond and allow them to share their reading experience with you.

5. Go out with your child to buy a special book

Make it a time you spend together, just the two of you. Take your child to the bookstore and tell them you would like to buy them a book, one that they will choose. Bookstores are a wonderful place to spend a little time just browsing. Your child will later associate the happy experience when they read their book at home. If you like, instead of visiting a bookstore, you can spend time together at the library, and borrow a book instead.

6. Refer back to the stories you read together

Casually in your conversations, refer back to the stories you read together. Make comments like, “It’s like the rabbit we read about, who couldn’t get out of his home. Remember?” This will help make the reading experience more valuable, and teach them to enrich their personal life with the things they learned about, or experienced through the book.

7. Write a special message

When giving your child a book as a gift, write a special message on the inside, sharing with them how much you look forward to sharing this book with them, or how proud you are that they’re reading so much. This will strengthen the bond between the two of you, and make the habit of reading even more enjoyable.

8. Read in front of your child

Children learn by example. If you enjoy reading, they will learn to enjoy reading just by watching you. Take the time to cozy up at home with a book you really enjoy. Children will see reading as a part of home life, and often will start to do the same.

9. Share with them what you learned from reading

During dinner time, or at any time throughout the day, share the things you read about in your books. Offer insights such as, “This book really made be think about the importance of appreciating what you have,” or “I loved reading the part where the woman was faced with a life-changing decision, it reminded me of a time when I was young.” When sharing preface your comment by saying, “I read today,” so your children see other positive examples of how reading enriches your life. Likewise, tell your family about what you read in the newspaper, or what you learned from a magazine or blog.

10. Read your children’s books

Imagine a day when your 10-year-old child finishes reading a 400-page novel, passes it to you and says, “you should read this Mom, I’m sure you’ll love it. It has a really emotional part in it.” This can happen. When you spend years reading together and talking about books with your child, you will develop a bond and common interest. Your children will begin to know what books appeal to you and vice versa. Reading creates confidence in children and sets the foundation for them to read more complex stories as they mature.

Literacy is one of the most important skills you can teach your child. Take the time to foster this skill at home in a way that is fun and appealing. Following these ten steps will help your child take pleasure in books, rather than viewing reading as a chore.

Happy reading!

|Source: Huffington Post|

Many parents struggle with whether or not to enroll their children in activities and courses before kindergarten, or to simply let kids be kids. On one hand, pushing your child to succeed academically before kindergarten can seem unnecessary, and even unhealthy at times. However when you see other parents focused on preparing their children for kindergarten, you can’t help but wonder if your child will be left behind.

Fear of falling behind is NOT a good reason to send your child to school early. With that said, leaving your child at home to allow him or her plenty of time to play, is not necessarily the best option either.

The reason why parents and teachers feel forced to choose between learning and play is because they are not aware that doing one doesn’t necessarily mean ignoring the other. Many parents and early learning centres have focused solely on free play or strict school-like lessons. The reality is, you can choose a hybrid of both. By this I don’t mean a few strict lessons intertwined with free play. I mean creating an environment (whether it be at home or school) in which children can play, discover, make friends, laugh and express themselves, while receiving the stimulation they need to develop their brains to the fullest potential. Children rarely reach their fullest potential playing alone. By creating a play environment rich in language and allowing your child interactions with teachers and other children, you are nurturing your child’s natural curiosity and stimulating their brain development at a critical age.

Research shows that a child’s brain is in its most formative years before the age of six. This is a prime time for a child to learn as the impact is thought to be greater than all the years of elementary education combined. For this reason, I always recommend that parents expose their children to as much learning as possible before the age of six.

I caution you, however, to choose a program that is respectful of your child’s interests and needs. If keeping your child at home is your best option, remember that children benefit tremendously from socializing with other children. So do your best to provide social experiences for your children in an environment where they can also begin to develop a variety of skills from reasoning to experimenting to reading, art and everything in between.

As long as your child receives the stimulation and socialization needed, the way you achieve this is not as important.

The other thing I would like to caution you of, is over-booking your child with activities. Parents who enroll their children in various activities each and every day may actually be depriving them of one essential component: the freedom to think independently. Always following instructions from teachers limits a child’s critical thinking skills. Allow your child to spend longer amounts of time with friends as opposed to always enrolling them in highly structured music or dance classes. Let them play what they want to play. Too many activities and social settings for your child can cause unnecessary stress.

Children also need plenty of idle time. One of the biggest misconceptions in our society is that children must be busy all the time. Children need to take their time, spend time alone, and become involved in nothing in particular. This is how they develop their imaginations and actually learn from their environment.

An ideal early learning program should respect a child’s interest and desire to participate (or not) in a variety of activities. Thankfully for Canadian parents, there are wonderful programs available for young children, which vary from only a few days a week to full-time.

To enhance your child’s daily learning at home, try taking your time before, during and after your scheduled activities. Next time you walk to the park, notice how many things your child stops to explore, from a tiny bug to a colorful sign. Adults are more goal-oriented and want to get from point A to point B as fast as possible. Remember, for a child, everything is new. They may never have seen an insect climbing a leaf in a garden. They are learning so much about the way it moves, eats, and lives.

Learning about the world around them, classifying and interpreting that knowledge is how young children learn. You may think the park is fun for them, but absorbing their surroundings on the way there is just as interesting for them. All you have to do to provide these learning experiences is leave home with plenty of time and patience so your child is not rushed and can explore at ease. Similarly, when you go to the supermarket, take time to chat with them about the fruits and vegetables. Explore the different shapes, colours, and textures.

I wish you the very best in this wonderful journey. And I especially hope you take the time to enjoy it together, and talk about your wonderful experiences as a family!

|Source: Huffington Post|

A four-year-old girl walks into a classroom for the first time. She does not speak English, and she knows no one, except her father who is lovingly dropping her off. The children are playing and only one boy notices her by the door from the other side of the room.

He gets up, walks towards her and reaches for her hand. He doesn’t say a word, but when he looks at her, she knows he understands exactly how she feels, and she feels safe.

Children who are empathetic are better able to deal with their emotions and those of others during conflict or even in everyday situations. This also allows them to “read” social cues, such as when a person wants to play and when they prefer to be left alone, or when it’s ok to give someone a hug. This will help your child make friends easier, have deeper and more meaningful relationships, and even have better grades at school.

Every child has the innate ability to understand another person’s circumstances, thoughts and feelings, which is described as empathy.

As parents, all we need to do is cultivate it. Here are six tips to teach your child empathy:

1. Help your child recognize different feelings.

Help your baby recognize different basic emotions and begin identifying them with words. Start with basic feelings, like “angry”, “happy” or “sad” and evolve to more subtle ones like “proud” or “disappointed”. This is the first lesson in teaching empathy and emotional intelligence. You can draw how you feel, talk about it, express it with movement, but don’t forget the most important prop: a mirror. Show your child their facial expression for each emotion, and explore it together.

As they grow older, use more complex vocabulary to help them understand how they feel: “It surprised you to see dad arrive so early today.” To enhance this learning, make sure you share with your child how you are feeling as well, by using feeling words yourself.

2. Be aware of others’ feelings.

As you go through the day, demonstrate empathetic behaviour by observing other people’s state of mind. Invite your child to participate in this observation by including it as part of your daily conversations. For instance, “That baby is laughing, she must feel so happy!” or “Look at the puppy in the car, it must be feeling lonely”. This will help your child recognize feelings in others.

3. Walk your talk.

The best way to teach your child empathy is to be empathetic as parents. Respond to your newborn’s needs with empathy and kindness, don’t keep him crying or waiting and you will teach him that you care. As they grow older, listen to them and let them know they are loved and understood.

They will learn that even being there for someone provides comfort. If your child sees you holding the door for strangers, or giving up your seat for someone who needs it more, it will teach your child not only to understand how others are feeling, but to know that they have the ability to make people feel better.

4. Help your child understand others.

Your child covers his ears when he hears another child cry very loudly. His first reaction is to feel bothered by the child. You take the time to look, then quietly comment to your child “That boy seems very upset, I see he is also holding his leg, he must have fallen and hurt himself. How can we help?”

As your child gains more practice, choose situations that are progressively more subtle or complex: “I noticed that Sam had his head down and was walking slowly after school today, I wonder if he had a chance to play with anyone at recess? Do you know if he might be feeling left out?”. Try also to help your child understand why a person may be affected by something that does not seem so obvious to them “Your sister is not upset with you, she is upset because she did not do very well on her test. She just needs a little time alone until it passes and she can think about it without getting emotional.”

5. Show your child how to make others feel good.

It is incredibly rewarding to make someone else happy. Give your child ample opportunity to care for you (they can make you a tea, for instance, or save you a piece of their chocolate bar), for siblings (“What do you think we could prepare for dinner that would make your brother feel special?”), for others (“it was really nice of you to hold the door for that man at the supermarket, especially because he looked so tired”. Once your children receive an allowance, teach them to set aside the amount they choose to help someone else. They can choose to help someone in need, or raise funds for something they believe in, like saving endangered species.

6. Praise empathy in your child.

When you see your little one demonstrating empathy, concern, or care for others, be quick to compliment her on her actions. “It was very nice of you to share your bucket at the park. How did you know this child wanted to play with it?” or “You made grandma very happy by giving her such a big hug. She misses you so much when she doesn’t see you!” Children who are empathetic feel much happier and more fulfilled. They also have a much higher level of understanding and acceptance for other cultures, and embrace different people and experiences regardless of how different they are from their own. They have more respect for animals, insects, and the environment, and have the qualities needed to be a true leader, an example for others. The next lesson will be to ensure that they treat themselves with the same kindness and respect as they treat others. The same way you taught your child to discover his feelings first before being able to understand how others feel, teach him that unless he feels happy and his needs are met, he won’t have much to give. A lesson as parents we also should learn!

| SOURCE: West Coast Families |

For couples with a new baby, learning to parent, share their home and even their bedroom make up the bulk of their time during first few months of parenthood. There are more books to read, laundry and chores to do, and there is much less time. Baby needs constant attention. Nights are busy with multiple feedings and mornings start early, very early.

So how do couples adjust to these new demands and still find time to nurture their own bond – sans baby?

Below are five simple steps you and your spouse can take to keep the romance alive, after you have a child

1. Make a date and stick to it

Chances are your schedules were busy before baby was born. Now you’re taking turns working, napping, cleaning, feeding and caring for your little one. This means time spent as a couple is sacrificed. By setting a date to spend some quality time with your partner, you’re instilling a habit, which will have great benefits for both you, your partner and your child. This may start as a simple coffee date down the street on Saturdays in between feedings when your babysitter or relative can stop by. Eventually, when you’re able to leave your child for a couple hours, your date can evolve into dinner or a movie. If you can’t leave your children, plan for a special dinner once a week after they go to bed. Set a beautiful table and take turns cooking for each other or together. The idea is to make alone time with your partner a regular occurrence, one that is prioritized and doesn’t get bumped aside.

2. Take a romantic stroll during your child’s nap

Turn your child’s naptime into a romantic walk for you and your partner. The fresh air is good for your child while he is sleeping in the stroller, and you and your partner can enjoy a scenic stroll while having an opportunity to talk. Children sleep much better outdoors, and this can buy you up to two hours with your partner. Make sure the setting is natural so your child is not disturbed by high traffic noises or the lights and sounds of a busy mall.

3. Show your affection, “just because”

Remember when you used to call each other just to say, “hi?” That doesn’t need to stop. Nor do the love notes or text messages or showing your love, just because. Experiment with doing something loving for your partner once a week. This could be leaving a love note on the bathroom mirror or hiding a favorite treat in your spouse’s coat pocket. These acts of love and kindness don’t take a lot of effort or time, but they do show your partner you love him and you care.

4. Give your partner the day off

Okay so a whole day may be out of the question, but surely you can give your partner an afternoon to spend time with his friends or even just to have a nap, while you take care of baby. If your partner is home and you can tell he’s run down, offer to run him a warm bubble bath and surprise him with champagne and strawberries or a new book. These acts of service show your partner that you consider his time and needs important. More likely than not, he will return the favor.

5. Take five minutes to connect each day

It’s easy to lose track of what’s going on in your partner’s world outside of the home, when your child is born. Conversations and attention tend to revolve around your children and not your spouse. Take at least five minutes each day to ask your spouse about his day and have him ask about yours. Make a habit of doing this at a time when you can give each other your undivided attention. Really listen without judgment when your partner is talking and try to put yourself in his shoes. You’ll be surprised at how a little empathy can go along way in keeping you both connected.

Time is precious when you become a parent. Your personal life suddenly seems non-existence and often you’re too tired to think of planning anything beyond your child’s next play date. However, making a habit of connecting with your partner on a regular basis can actually lesson the load and make the journey of being a parent much more enjoyable. Not only that, but your children are exposed to parents who are affectionate with each other, happy to be together and very much in love from a young age. This ensures that they have a good foundation and a model to build their own relationships in the future.

| SOURCE: Working Mother |